I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
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