I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
