'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
