cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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