is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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