I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
