oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
