He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize