I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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