absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
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there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
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