Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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