I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
