Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I need help removing her.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
