Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize