yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
