I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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