She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately