I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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