Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
