Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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