You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
