i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
