i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
