He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
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My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
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I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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