its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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