i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Randomize
