you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
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