Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
