i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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