i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
