I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize