I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'