it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize