Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
