Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
