Pappa wants mamma naked
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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