Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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