So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
