how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize