woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
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I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
No...this little piggys going to the bar
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
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But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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