Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Randomize
