its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
