they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
My bed smells like the plague
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