singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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