Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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