when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
You don't make any sense
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