we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
