I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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