i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
