ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
That accounts for only three of the penises
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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