You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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